Deerfield House of Awkward Photos

Earlier this year taking photos at estate sales suddenly became more difficult. I'm not sure why. Maybe there was more sales staff around. Maybe those staffers were more suspicious than usual of someone not tearing through the place like a tween through Justin Bieber's underwear drawer. Maybe I was just paranoid.

At any rate, for a number of weeks I skulked and snuck my way through the suburbs, trying to capture pictures without getting captured myself. Which was too bad, because this was a lovely home with many lovely vistas worth capturing.

This sunroom was big and warm, with glass on three sides. And a salesperson following closely behind me on the fourth.

The livingroom was a French provincial fantasia in pink and green, presided over by an eagle-eyed cashier who wasn't about to let me out of her sight.

This upstairs guest room was decorated in a desert palette guaranteed to encourage a night of tossing and turning, just you and your lonely guitar.

Just passing by, don't mind me!

Tell me about it.

It wasn't until I got down to the basement that I was able to find any peace and quiet. And thank goodness, because that's where I found this.

It wasn't in perfect condition, but it was a complete set and obviously authentic, with leather-covered cushions.

They wanted something like a $1000 for the whole thing, and I'm sure they could have been talked down to about half of that.

I know this, because while I was snapping these photos one of those helpful sales people came downstairs. She caught me, phone in hand, lining up a shot. "You must be interested in that," she said.

"Yes," I replied. Oh, yes. You have no idea.

Deerfield Pagoda

A little theme goes a long way in home decorating. Case in point, this condominium in Deerfield, chockablock with Chinese touches.

We begin in the dining room, with Chinese poppies in the middle of the table.

And Chinese-themed chairs gathered around it.

And Chinese-themed sideboards on either side of it.

Even this looks like a lounge you might find at the Taipei airport.

(And yes, of course, there was Christmas stuff. Made even more festive by its display against that carpeting. Still, it was virtually untouched by buyers. Once again estate sale companies: Throw this stuff away.)

The sofa was Chinese. (Or at least the upholstery was. I know it's hard to tell in this photo, but trust me.)

The artwork was Chinese.

Yes, even the wallpaper was Chinese.

But it didn't stop there. Oh, no.

There were little Chinese chests.

Pictures of Chinese sunsets.

And "Chinese" fixtures for the bathroom -- though it's a mystery why these were never installed. They might have been gifts. Someone may have figured, "So-and-so is obviously nuts for Chinese stuff, so these will be perfect for her," but ended up striking out anyway.

Let's take a looky-loo upstairs.

Adorable stuffed animals -- no doubt made in China.

And in the master suite, a bed fit for the emperor of China himself.

Finally, I found this on the wall of the living room. I don't know what it is, but the smart money says it's a Chinese character. Maybe for "goodbye."

You know what's really funny about this place? An hour later we had to go back.